Bloody Monday.

It's amazing the things you find out with a little searching. But if you're really not ready to learn the truth, then you probably shouldn't go sniffing around. You're better off. Honestly I shouldn't care anymore. I shouldn't have let things get as out of control as they did. But here I sit with this new found information and no real satisfaction other than knowing the truth. Really, I just feel like complete shit. Like I don't really make any amount of difference in this world...but I know that it's just a "passing" feeling and I can't hold onto it or it'll swallow me whole and drown me in it's murky depressive nature. So I can only move forward. Fuck. It shouldn't matter. It shouldn't matter. It really shouldn't fucking matter. Okay. That feels a little better. I'm gonna go home soon, hopefully hang out with Gabe a little, play some guitar, then go for a run. I'm really looking forward to the run and working some shit out. That'll help extensively, I'm sure of it.